until a research paper do us part...

my quasi love affair with writing is on the rocks. i am trying to finish up my research paper, and i have writer's block. it is actually painful to write. what's ironic about this whole thing is that i can write forever. i like to write. and to add to the stupidity of all of this, I'VE DONE MY RESEARCH!! yes, that's right, i've gone through at least 15-20 sources, some primary and some secondary. i have the material that i need, but i can't write.

i'll tell you what is at the root of the matter. i was told that i needed to type 20-30 pages. anytime i am given a NUMBER OF PAGES, i freeze! i can't think of anything, but the NUMBER!! the last time i had a paper due for this history class, 8 was the magic number and i completely froze on that, too!

to add to how crazy and pathetic this is, i remember writing excessively in my other history classes i took at del mar. they were darn near dissertations or at the very least a thesis. the professor would ask for 14 lines in a response or writing assignments and i would write paragraphs upon paragraphs until i had several pages.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME????

does anyone out there have the same thing happen?

by the way, the paper is due tomorrow. i, my dear reader, will turn it in late on thursday. i just can't do it. i have 12 pages (i know because every time i write a sentence i scroll down to the end of my document to see how much more i have to go!!)

signs of life

i went out to run today...and it felt great! i need to get my rear in gear if i'm going to run in beach to bay. i believe it is in 7 weeks. i'm going to give my activity logs another shot.

so here we go...


Monday: jogged for 20 minutes (at a half decent pace) and walked for 10 minutes (mas o menos)

i will see you back here tomorrow.

on the french front:

bonjour, mon ami. comment-vas tu? est-ce que tu vas bien? je suis tres fatiguee parce que je suis alle a l'universite au jourd'hui. je vais dormir. a bientot!

my life...

my life is a beautiful idea that i all too often neglect.



why? i, like my namesake in the bible, am regularly caught up with the blasted details of life's trifles. the unforgiving daily chores that become fastidious taskmasters. CLEAN THE KITCHEN! WASH THOSE DISHES! WASH THE NEVER ENDING MOUNTAIN OF LAUNDRY!



all the while, life (as beautiful as it is) is passing me by...

a streetcar named Degenerate

i don't think i have ever had such a strong reaction against a piece of literature as i feel for this play. i simply don't see any artistic value in it--i think it is as degenerate as they come. i particularly didn't like the last scene.

my question, then, is why and how is it that this play can be called a classic? it is entirely possible that i am too closed minded and a simpleton. i fail, however, to see any redeeming qualities of a play in which a mentally ill woman is raped by her bestial brother-in-law and then sent to an asylum by her callous and calculating sister!

signed? sealed? and not delivered?

in vain have i waited...i have waited in vain. (how's that for redundancy?)

seriously, i have waited in vain to read about how wonderful and great i am as a scholar. i have patiently awaited the good news, but to no avail. you see, i asked two professors for letters of recommendation, so that i may apply for a scholarship. i have not received either one of them. i'm in denial, of course, and i'm blaming the awful postal service. those dirty, rotten scoundrels have misplaced my letters! i'm sure of it.

on a more serious note, i'm still grounded as far as my research paper goes. i do have one sentence that i would love to include, but i'm not sure it's very scholarly. it goes something along these lines, President Truman's remark on April 23, 1945 echoed the pragmatic and not so diplomatic sentiments of some Americans, "...if the Russians did not wish to join us they could go to hell." the story is very interesting, especially since we have the advantage of seeing how all of the events of the cold war played out. i'm sure they were very trying times, however. the fact that diplomacy did not prevail, and that the u.s. and russia endured such harsh international relations for decades is sobering.

saturday night research fever

it's a saturday night, and i'm working on a research paper. does that sound wrong or what?



the first five pages of my research paper are due the wednesday i get back from spring break. i really want to do well on this paper, so i'm trying to gather the information i need. the paper is on the marshall plan and the coming cold war. i like the topic (i should, i chose it!), but i really don't have the energy to work on it. i have been gathering info here and there. i've read "the tragedy of american diplomacy" and find williams arguments very interesting.

this is me leading the glamorous life of a student! i'll tell you what, it "ain't" easy being a renaissance girl.

so here is to all the moms trying to get a college degree with kids, husband, house, and everything else in tow!!!

mid-term mania

well...you know you are up to your eyeballs in mid-terms when...

i was in the library studying for an exam. when i went to buy a blue book and a drink, i told the attendant, "i'm taking the drink and the mid-term." (all the while pointing at the blue book) i think she understands mid-term speak because she just grabbed the blue book and handed it to me.